And so, I am going on Sunday morning. I'm announcing it here because if I don't, I probably won't go. But now I've put it out there, and I will follow through.
I love cashew butter and I'm ambivalent about matzoh, but I hated the way I was eating it. Not tasting or chewing, just swallowing and numbing. Yikes.
I've spent some time today trying to argue my way out of reasons why I should just get over my fear and go to a meeting, but I haven't really come up with anything good enough to talk myself out of it. So I guess I'll just have to feel the fear and do it anyways.
Aside from last night's sink-eating affair, I'm still feeling pretty fantastic. 2012, you've been so good to me, and I feel giggly deep down in my soul about you. Thanks.
In my classes this week, I'm drawing inspiration from a conversation I had last night with a friend, and from a quote that another yogini shared with me: "Muddy waters, let stand, become clear." Isn't that beautiful? Can't you just picture the mud and dirt of a pond slowly settling to the bottom to become part of the seabed, leaving clear and pure water at the top? I love this image, and I've been meditating on it all day. We are always trying to fix, to change, to manipulate...what if we just walked away and let things settle on their own? I really believe with all my heart and soul that the task of life is to follow our hearts and commit to our path, and let everything else fall into place. To get out of our own way and let things unfold as they are meant to. Going to an OA meeting is just another way for me to explore my relationship with food as a path to wholeness, clarity, and ultimately, true happiness. What comes of the OA meeting isn't really as significant as me showing up and giving it a shot, and I don't need to worry about the rest.
Onward....
No comments:
Post a Comment